Saturday 18 September 2010

Ripples - Writers Island # 21.

Writer's Island - the prompt this week is
an idyllic painting by Vane Kosturanov entitled: “FISHERMAN”.
Let the serene, ‘walden-esque’ image of the painting itself evoke in you the inspiration to write…


RIPPLES

The moment she said it
she saw her words spread throughout the room
she'd thrown a large and thoughtless stone
right into the middle of them
she could see the ripples of her thoughtlessness reaching out
and touching each one
personally
being hand delivered
and that beautiful calm that was
was now gone
and she stood
and watched impotent as the words took hold
and started to sink
deeper and deeper
being swallowed whole
as if they were the truth
and there was nothing she could do
except watch and wait for the ripples to end.

25 comments:

Dick said...

A neat and well-sustained extended metaphor and an effective symbolic interpretation.

Amanda Moore said...

Gosh I have been here before, the moment when you're not sure of the impact what you said will have, should you have even said it! You captured it perfectly!

Diane T said...

I very much like your unique take on this prompt!

"Ripples of her thoughlessness" -- good phrase

Elizabeth said...

You hit home with this one. I am facing into a situation where I know that my words, if I speak them, will be the stone that causes innumerable ripples. Would you please write another one about deciding whether or not to speak at all is fear in a fight with angst? I need it by next weekend.

Thank you, and I mean that truly and sincerely,


Elizabeth

Susannah said...

I absolutely love this!

Nice writing. :-)

Deborah said...

Thank you everso much for your comments, they are very much appreciated :o)
and Elizabeth, ooh I don't envy you this dilemma, sometimes ripples are inevitable but only you know whether it's important enough to make them, I really do wish you all the best with this one x

Weasel said...

Loved where you took the prompt! Wonderful post! =)

-Weasel

Myrna R. said...

Nice. I really like your writing. I read your magpie tale also.

Thank you for visiting my site. I'll return to yours. It's great that you use prompts for most of your writing.

Anonymous said...

oh I so know that feeling of words having slipped out that I would do anything to take back - loved your take on the prompt

flaubert said...

Nice Deborah!
Pamela

barbara said...

Ouch!
Far too familiar with that feeling.
I especially like the swallowed whole as if they were the truth/swallowed by the water idea.
neat work.

Ron. said...

Like infinitely repeating ripples, some dust never settles (pardon the mixed metaphor). Well done.

Roan said...

I recognize this situation! This is a different variation on the prompt, but it works very well!

anthonynorth said...

I think we've all been there. Nicely done.

Anonymous said...

I relate to this is some way ! Being affected by a friend's thoughtless words, i could feel the ripples affecting me !

Marie Elena said...

Deborah,I'm so impressed with your completely original "take" on this prompt. Excellent work!

Anonymous said...

Leaves me gasping for breath; don't we all know that sinking feeling!

Anonymous said...

Did the ripples ever end? Do they? Nice write here friend. Love and Light, Sender

Deborah said...

Thank you everyone for the lovely comments x

rashmi said...

very nice poem.we can feel a ripple of talk just passing through the room.

Tilly Bud said...

'the ripples of her thoughtlessness' - wonderful imagery.

I hope it's not autobiographical.

Anonymous said...

A great poem and perspective! :) River

Victoria said...

A beautiful exposition of a deep subject...the weight of our words that can never be retracted. The image is exquisite.

Auntie Q said...

That was amazing! Not what I was expecting from the prompt.

Anonymous said...

Beautiful way to use the painting without making your writing about what the painting portrays at all. Aside from that, I really enjoyed the way you took me through that one moment slowly and thoroughly, almost in slow motion, just as it would feel if it were happening right in front me, if it were me who threw the stone. Lovely piece.